


Neurotic

by The_Heartsmith



Series: Dear Evan Cutesen [1]
Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Anxiety, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Bath Bomb related pranks, Bisexual Evan Hansen, Connor Deserves Happiness, Demigods, Depression, F/F, F/M, Gay, M/M, Nico's and Connor's dark humor, POV Evan Hansen, Percy Jackson AU, Self-Harm, Why Jared Kleinman Loves Bath Bombs, all that depressing shit, and dying, puns
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-21 03:19:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14275812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Heartsmith/pseuds/The_Heartsmith
Summary: Evan Hansen is your average senior highschooler, or, well, not exactly. With his being unable to spend extended time with anyone at all without wanting to cry and his obsession with trees, and maybe the complete lack of real friends, Evan is a far cry from average.Oh, and he’s also a halfblood. How ’bout that?





	Neurotic

**Author's Note:**

  * For [me myself and I](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=me+myself+and+I).



> Hey guys! As you can see, I have most of my fics on an indefinite hiatus. But I will try to update this one as often as I can! College comes first, though.  
> (Not at all currently doing this instead of my school work, *cough cough*)
> 
> This fic is set first day of Senior Year (Beginning of Canon Dear Evan Hansen) and directly after the Heroes of Olympus series’ end. There might be sneaks and mentions of Trials of Apollo.
> 
> Having read/watched PJ, HOO and DEH is good if you want to fully understand what’s going on, but it’s not really necessary since everything will be explained, eventually. (and for y’all musical fans, there’s a PJ musical called The Lightning Thief!)
> 
> A friendly reminder that I do not own either Dear Evan Hansen nor any of Rick Riordian’s works. (I wish)
> 
> TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR ALL CHAPTERS, SINCE I’M TOO LAZY TO WRITE THEM IN EACH CHAPTER NOTE UNLESS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY: depression (I mean, Connor, Evan, Nico, Annabeth and Percy are gonna be in this, so), anxiety attacks (duh. or should i say deh?), self harm, past self harm, swearing, violence (again, duh, it’s greek mythology), transphobic language, internalized homophobia, tooth-rotting fluff, ghosts, mentions of death, actual death, PTSD, ableism, spiders (bc I F*CKING HATE SPIDERS), Dark humor (Looking at you, Nico n’ Connor)
> 
> DAS IT, HAVE FUN Y’ALL (am I even using ”y’all” ironically anymore idk)

Evan wasn’t really sure that this was a regular thing that happened during lunch.

Well, it’s not like he’d really know, never actually sitting in the cafeteria at all unless Jared dragged him there, but he was pretty sure there wasn’t supposed to be any one-eyed lunch-ladies serving their food. And most lunch-ladies tended to not wear christmas themed Hawaiian shirts in the middle of August, either. 

But there was also the possibility that the lunch-lady just had some strange eye condition that everyone else had the courtesy of not mentioning and that she had laundry day, and Evan was just a judgemental asshole for assuming that she was some kind of strange monster or something? 

Evan wiped his sweaty hands on his pants and looked around. No one else seemed to notice the strange lunch-lady. Maybe it really was a condition? Or maybe he woke up this morning with some kind of brain hemorrhage after his fall, and was just now experiencing the effects of falling out of a 15 meter tall tree? Maybe he was still dreaming, and would do something really strange and stupid in front of Zoe for no good reason and have dream-everyone laugh at him so that he’d wake up too stressed to go to school on the first day because he couldn’t-

”Whoa, Hansen, breathe for a second. What’s got your panties in a knot?” 

The blond blinked, looking at his best family-friend’s worried frown across the table. Or, not worried, more annoyed, probably. Evan took a few deep breaths and tried to smile reassuringly, but from Jared’s raised eyebrow he must’ve failed spectacularly. 

”A-Ah, um, nothing’s wrong! I-I’m just, a little, y-y’know…” he stuttered, frantically wiping his hands on his pants before he diverting them to his lunch. 

”Horny?” Jared suggested, ”Crazy? Gay, maybe?” 

Immediately Evan felt his face burn in embarrassment. He knew Jared was just teasing, but did he really have to do this every time? 

”N-n-none of those! I’m not horny! Or crazy! O-or g-gay!” he whisper-shouted, shakily trying to peel an orange for his lunch bag. He scraped the shell with his bitten down nails until it begun to peel, and grimaced when he felt the sticky juice touching his fingers.

”Suuuure.” Jared said, the teasing smirk practically audible in his voice as he handed Evan a napkin, ”And I’m Thomas Jefferson, magenta chaos and third president of the United States.”

Evan gratefully took the napkin with a small thank you, then sighed at the other boy.

”M-maybe you should s-stop projecting your o-o-own feelings on me! And d-don’t drag Jefferson i-into this.”

”Aww, why not? It’s not like-”

Suddenly a loud banging noise was heard from the food-line, and both Evan’s and Jared’s heads snapped towards the noise. 

Evan blinked.

Zoe, beautiful, majestic, kind Zoe, was holding a knife (Was that bronze?) against the lunch-lady’s throat. Her hair was neatly braided on both sides of her head, and the way the indigo streaks seemed to intensify the sharp green of her eyes seemed to be the only thing Evan could focus on until he realized that Zoe was, indeed, holding a knife to the one-eyed lunch-lady’s throat.   
  
The entire cafeteria was silent, still, like no one dared to breathe. 

Zoe pressed the knife closer to the lunch-lady’s throat and growled something that sounded like… Was that another language? It sounded like some kind of blurred english, with rounded words and dangerous undertones. 

This wasn’t right! This wasn’t okay, this wasn’t right, and this wasn’t _Zoe_! This wasn’t the kind girl that said hi to Evan in the hallways and helped him pick up his books from the floor! It couldn’t be!

Evan felt sudden courage flood his veins, and before he could think, he had stood from his seat and started running. Suddenly the others seemed to come back to life, shouts of ” _Oh my GOD!_ ” and ” _SOMEONE CALL THE POLICE!”_ penetrating the air. Evan heard sobs, running footsteps, and Jared’s shout of ” _Evan, what the FUCK?!_ ” as he raced towards the lunch-lady’s rescue.

He felt fire in his veins, righteous anger and a voice telling him ”you can do this”. 

He wondered briefly if he was going insane before he leaped at a shocked Zoe Murphy, quickly snatching the knife from her hands and pretty much body slamming her into the floor.

The blond wheezed when his already broken arm hit the floor, but before he could do much but register the pain, a tall, brown haired figure was upon him.  
  
And with a swift punch to the head, Evan knew nothing but black.

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is freudiandip, hit me up with DEH writing/drawing prompts and pLEASE ASK ME QUESTIONS, BE MY FRIEND, I’M SO LONELY D:
> 
> There’s also a therapy blog for (canon) Evan about trees, emotions, and sometimes his day called notsosincerelyme! Updates sporadically, depending on his mood and the Author’s internet connection.Anyway, please comment kudo and sub-scribeeee (MacDoesIt anyone??)
> 
> Thanks for reading, peeps <3


End file.
